Death...

as i took a break from my treadmill run i had an interesting thought... I wished that there could be something that just wrote ALL of my thoughts out. What would they be of?, what would be the most common thought... and then I wondered how often do I think of death and wish it was me instead?... I know it's kind of morbid but it's true I sometimes wonder if I'm super weird, If I'm going through some type of phase, or maybe I am a depressive person and I do so well at covering it up that I fool even myself...

it's true...
most of the time I do wish it was me.
in difficult times when I don't think I'll make it through with dignity and poise, I just wish I could die instead.
sometimes I think I burden people... I don't want to do that... so my plan is that when I die... there won't be rushing around trying to figure out the program... don't worry I got it. ;) just relax...

somehow though I can't help but think that I'm still around for a reason. There's a purpose for my existence yet...